These simple conversation starters work with girls, guys, and everyone! If you’re looking for some texting tips or even just going to a networking event, these conversation starters are sure to help you.
Today we’re going to learn about five conversation starters that work every time. Now, let’s begin.
Sometimes the most straightforward questions make the best conversation starters, especially when you let someone else step into the spotlight. This trick is straightforward. Just think of a problem. Yeah, any question.
You might be wondering how much would it cost to host your events, or maybe you’re looking at a couple of pictures on your phone, and you want to know which one sounds better.
Your question could be long or short, simple or complicated. It doesn’t matter because the item itself is just the tool that you can use to get the conversation rolling. For example, a new conversation might go something like this; after listening to a keynote speaker, imagine you’re sitting in the audience waiting for the next lecture to start, you notice someone sitting quietly next to you, so you decide to get a conversation going.
You turn to them, and you say ‘I thought that the speaker was great, what did you think?’ The key to this technique isn’t the subject you’re talking about; it’s the way you say it. Jumping back to our example, you could have said, hey! What did you think of that speaker? And it might have worked.
Expressing your own opinion first sets the tone. Imagine if you ask for their advice and it was completely different from yours. Maybe they hated the speaker, and they thought the whole presentation was a mess. If your opinions directly opposed each other, things are going to get awkward fast .so, that’s why you tell them your opinion first in one sentence.
You introduce something to talk about, and you set the tone for the entire conversation, which makes the next part even more comfortable. Just follow up with what do you with that question. The ball is in their court. You’ve given them a starting point, and you’ve told them that you want to hear their opinion. No matter who you’re talking to, they’ll feel comfortable talking back.
In the 1700s, Ben Franklin discovered a foolproof way to start a conversation and immediately got on anyone’s right side. All you have to do is lead with a simple favor. Let’s say you’re at a networking event, you spot a stranger across the room, and you want to start up a conversation. So, what should you do?.
You could shake their hand and introduce yourself, but that doesn’t feel right. It feels like you’re just popping up out of nowhere. What you need is an excuse, a reason to justify starting that conversation and a small favor can be the perfect pretext. Just walk up and ask for something quick and easy.
Ask them to take a picture of you, or if they know the time, these favors take only a few seconds but they completely changed the dynamic of your relationship because you’re not just two strangers anymore. Small support creates a sort of personal bond.
Once you’ve gone out of your way to help someone you’ve invested in them, they matter more to you, and you care about what they think. Now, all this sounds like a good idea in theory but how do we know that asking for a small favor works well?
A famous study from the 1960s put this technique to the test. In that study, college students participated in a competition where they could win money, but after being handed their winnings, one of three things happen. 1/3 of the students took their winnings home; another third were asked to donate their winnings to the psychology department because their funds were running low, and the final third was approached by one of the researchers. The researcher asks the students to return their money to him because he’d been paying participants out of his pocket. In other words, he asked them for a personal favor. So, which group do you think like that research the most?.
You would think group number one because they walked out with the most money, but the answer is group three. The group that returned their winnings directly to the researcher after doing him a small favor. Their opinions of that researcher went way up. But why is that, why do we like people more after doing something beautiful for them?
The truth is we like people more because we did something beautiful for them. Thanks to a psychological phenomenon called cognitive dissonance. We want our thoughts and actions to line up. For example, if you punch someone, your brain reasons that you’re angry with them. You may not know why they may have done nothing wrong. But your brain wants your mind to match your body, so when you do someone a favor, your brain makes another emotional leap.
You tell yourself that you did that person a favor for a reason, you assume. It’s because you liked that person even if you only did something small like tell them the time. Ben Franklin used the same technique to turn strangers and enemies into lifelong friends. So, if you want to start up a conversation, don’t be afraid to lead with a favor.
Favors aren’t the only way to get on someone’s right side. If you want to start a conversation and make a new friend while you’re at it, try leading with a compliment. Tell someone that you like their shirt or compliment their haircut. These genuine surface-level compliments will start any conversation on a high note because it instantly changes the mood.
After receiving a compliment, people are subconsciously warmer, friendlier, and more receptive to new things. It brightens up their day because a tribute makes them feel recognized and appreciated. It gives them a nice boost of self-esteem which also makes them more confident from the get-go. But there’s one essential thing to remember; you have to mean it.
If you’re going to compliment someone, don’t just pull something out of thin air, don’t pick the first arbitrary thing you see, because those compliments feel shallow. Even though you’re saying something beautiful, it doesn’t leave a lasting impact on anyone. Instead, a dishonest compliment will just make things awkward. They’ll think you’re trying to manipulate them, and that ruins any chance of building a relationship. So, take a second to think about what do you admire about this person, what makes them stand out from the crowd and that way when you do start up a conversation, they’ll know that you aren’t just faking it. You aren’t trying to pull the wool over their eyes. They’ll see that you do appreciate something about them.so, they’ll feel a lot more comfortable opening up.
Nostalgia is a powerful tool for any conversationalist. If you’re looking to meet new people, asking about their hometown is a great place to start. It’s a subject that almost everyone feels comfortable with. Because there’s no risk involved and not to mention it’s just fun to reminisce about the good old days. When they think back on the place they grew up in, it puts them in a great mood, and it opens all kinds of new opportunities for you.
There are practically endless questions that you can ask about someone’s past, ask him what it was like to grow up in their hometown, ask him what the weather was like in their city? Did they have crazy snowstorms? Was it over a hundred degrees every single day ?. Each of these questions keeps the conversation rolling without getting too personal. It forges a meaningful connection without crossing the line because that’s the one thing you don’t want to do.
Don’t interrogate someone about their parents; don’t ask them why they moved away; if you ask these personal questions right away, they’ll make people uncomfortable? So, just keep it general and keep it fun. Any blast from the past should make you remember the good times, not the bad.
It ties you together, and it creates a mutual feeling of sympathy because you’re both having the same kind of experience. But, finding something in common can be a little tricky.
You just can’t walk up and take a shot in the dark. Say you like mountain biking. You can’t just randomly ask someone if they do too. Because there’s a good chance, they don’t. Luckily interests and hobbies aren’t the only things that you also might have in common. No matter where you are at, an event, at a party, or in the grocery store, there’s always one thing you have in stock your environment. So, use that commonality to your advantage.
If you’re at a house party, talk about the house or the crowd. If you’re networking at a convention, talk about booths, panels, or even the parking. You can start a conversation with any of these topics because everyone in the room knows what you’re talking about. You’ll never get a blank stare, you’ll never get a nervous laugh, and you’ll never risk killing the conversation before it even starts.
Just don’t talk about your environment for too long, these conversation starters are designed to get you off the ground, but they won’t keep you in the air. If you rely too heavily on any conversation starter, you’ll end up suffering through a whole bunch of awkward pauses. So, once you feel connected, introduce yourself, ask another question, or make a joke. You already survived the hardest part.
Now it’s time to take that conversation to the next level.
Also read: How to STOP Being Shy and Awkward (FOREVER)